There’s a hint of conspiracy in the heart of the small community of Battle Creek: residents are dismayed by the massive invasion of silver-furred squirrels.
It all began when Thaddeus Jenkins, owner of the only general store in Battle Creek, noticed his stock of nuts had disappeared. Quickly, he discovered that the culprits were none other than the silver-furred squirrels swarming the town. “They look like little disco balls when the sun reflects off their fur. It’s both adorable and terrifying,” admits Jenkins.
Given the crucial importance of nuts for the local economy of Battle Creek, the invasion of these glamorous rodents has become a major concern. Residents are wondering how these creatures became so numerous and why they seem to have a preference for the nuts in their town. Some even put forward the theory that these squirrels could be the result of a scientific experiment gone wrong.
Funnily enough, these squirrels do not seem to be attracted to other types of food. “I’ve tried to lure them with apples, carrots, even cookies! But no, they only want my nuts,” laments Jenkins.
The town of Battle Creek has started negotiations with the squirrels to find a peaceful solution to this situation. “We hope they understand the impact they’re having on our economy and will go look for nuts elsewhere,” says the mayor. “Or else we will have to consider more drastic measures.”
“I don’t want to harm these little shiny creatures,” says Jenkins. “But if they don’t reimburse my nuts, I’ll have to consider turning the store into a disco nightclub. After all, these squirrels seem to party all night already.”
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