Two lines of a lead: Outlandish researchers put forth a new theory. Our peaceful and crawling friends, the snails, could be the great invisible masters pulling the strings of our world.
Against all odds, snails may not just be simple shelled gastropods. A significant faction of alternative theory advocates argues that they are, in reality, our creeping masters. A web of more or less credible assumptions, tenuous clues, and disturbing coincidences supports this hypothesis, which, if proven true, could upend our view of the world.
“They are everywhere, they are slow, so they have time to think, to develop long-term strategies. Look at their spiral; it’s the symbol of infinity, of the eternal cycle. How can we not see a form of supreme wisdom in that? Snails are much more than they let us believe,” declares Mr. Snaillover, a fervent supporter of this alternative theory, in an exclusive interview.
These advocates claim that the snail is merely waiting for the right moment to seize power, or rather to reveal that it has held it for centuries. “They are like the Ninja Turtles; they crawl in the shadows and wait for the opportune moment,” adds Ms. Shellbeliever, another proponent of this theory. “They are silent; their language vibrates at a frequency we cannot hear, but they communicate, and we must learn to listen.”
For now, the scientific community remains skeptical of these seemingly delusional claims. But, as Dr. Conchologist, an eminent malacologist, points out, “In science, there is no room for dogma. Everything must be examined, even the wildest theories. Who knows, maybe snails are more than we believe. Even if, for the moment, nothing proves it tangibly.”
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