At the forefront of the anti-zombie front: grandpa and grandma, retirees armed with their walkers, fighting against the most drowsy plague in history.
In a horrifying but hilarious twist, a sudden “zombie epidemic” has hit the peaceful retirement home “Angel’s Rest”. The residents, once peaceful and sedentary, have transformed into a horde of the undead… very, very slow ones. The staff members, although shocked, have no choice but to laugh at this strange spectacle.
“I always knew these old folks would outlive me,” declared Marianne Pichon, a nurse at the facility, trying to contain her laughter. “But for them to become zombies, that’s just the icing on the cake.”
Local authorities have decided to let the situation resolve itself. “We considered various options, but ultimately, given the speed at which these zombies move, we estimated that they would all die of old age before even reaching the property gate,” mentioned police officer, Jean-Marie Ravel.
One of the residents, 92-year-old Roger Delatour, surprisingly took his transformation well. “To be honest, I think it adds a bit of spice to our daily life, but I must admit that I’m having a bit more trouble chewing my dentures,” he joked, waving his plastic denture at the police officer.
Although it may seem in poor taste to laugh at such a situation, it’s hard not to chuckle at a zombie apocalypse led by octogenarians armed with their canes and walkers. All we can do is pray they never discover the terrifying power of electric scooters.
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