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Saint-Aubierge reels over 2 millimeters: scandal on the Pré des Peupliers boulodrome

The throwing circle, painted at 48.2 cm instead of the regulation 50, plunges the village into millimeter-level turmoil. Three 4/6.3-graded gravel grains are also said to have pushed the jack 11 mm off line, shifting apéro from 19:12 to 19:17.

Thursday evening, at the traditional Grand Jet of the Pré des Peupliers, the sacred instant of Dédé Mèches’s “carreau plein fer” was cut short. A 30 mm boxwood jack, apparently influenced by a bump as sneaky as it was invisible, slipped away by half a centimeter. Right afterward, it was discovered that the throwing circle, freshly repainted for the season, measured only 48.2 cm. In a village where they still debate the optimal diameter of a slice of saucisson (4 mm in summer, 3.5 mm in winter), the measurement landed like a ricocheted boule.

Alerted, the Amicale Bouliste des Peupliers rolled out the arsenal: a spirit level set on an aluminum straightedge, butcher’s twine pulled drum-tight, and a home-made plywood template. Verdict: the north strip shows a 0.7% slope “due to spiral watering” the day before, while three fugitive pebbles—identified as 4/6.3—are said to have migrated under a gust of wind from the washhouse. As a result, the disputed spot has been cordoned off (neon pink string), and the scoreboard placard was rotated 90° “as a sign of technical reserve.”

“We respect tradition: we measure, we remeasure, and if it still won’t fit, we get out my sister-in-law’s sewing ruler. Here, it’s short by two and a half fingers, not one less,” insists, arms crossed, Josiane Palou, president of the Amicale. “No question of canceling the evening: we’ll reshuffle the teams, repaint the circle with a compass, and serve the terrine only when the bubble is in the middle.”

A crisis raking is scheduled for 6:59 this morning, No. 11 rakes (22 teeth) required. The jack will be re-certified on the cheesemonger’s table, reputedly flat to ±0.2 mm, while the circle will be brought back to 50.0 cm, zero tolerance. If everything returns to normal, the Twisted-Handle Trophy can be awarded this evening at precisely 19:16, just before the official “pickle-poke” (3.5 mm gauge), to avoid any further overflow… to the nearest millimeter.

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