In a startling revelation, Dr. Crunch announced yesterday the discovery of a tribe of baguette-men living in a bakery in Paris. A discovery that shakes our understanding of the laws of biology and pastry.
While enjoying his daily bread at the Boulangerie du Coin, Dr. Crunch, a specialist in whimsical archaeology, literally stumbled upon the discovery of a lifetime. “It was incredible, these baguette-men, coming out of the ovens, straight as ‘I’s and parading around the bakery as if they were the kings of baguettes,” he declared during an impromptu press conference in the pastry section.
Although this revelation may be hard to digest for some, Dr. Crunch produced damning images of these creatures, perfectly golden and crispy. “They seem to be made from the most delicious flour and speak a language that strangely resembles French with a regional accent,” he revealed, still in shock.
In an attempt to clarify the situation, we asked Dr. Snack, an expert in culinary anthropology: “This shakes all our theories. Who knows, perhaps we are all made of bread at a molecular level?” A cryptic comment that left more than one analyst perplexed.
However, a large number of people remain skeptical. Starting with Martine Flute, president of the Association of Parisian Bakeries, who declared: “This is really bread and circuses what Dr. Crunch is proposing. I don’t believe for a second these stories of baguette-men. After all, who would want to come out of a hot oven? Total absurdity!”
So, truth or fiction? Every crumb of evidence will be analyzed in the coming days. Meanwhile, our view of our morning baguette may be slightly altered.
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